Finding balance
So I went to see my doctor, herself a woman of a certain age. She was happy that I was eating a super-healthy diet, and had even lost some weight (maybe all that dancing?). She prescribed a vitamin. But she laughed when I explained my menopausal dilemma. “Enjoy it,” she said. “Write a book about it!” But what about hormonal imbalance or physiological problems? “It’s not that common, but it’s not uncommon for menopause to go either way,” she explained. “I have one woman in my practice who is as large as life, and yet she’s flying high, and the men are coming out of the woodwork.” Me too. Pheromones — or phero-moans, as one friend calls them —seemed to be wafting around me.
Indeed, as I began asking around, I found other kindred souls. One single friend confessed that she had bought The Rabbit, made popular by lovelorn Charlotte on Sex and the City. The vibrator wore out, cracked down the middle and she bought another. She also started shopping at Victoria’s Secret. “I only ever wore black or white underwear,” she confides. “But at age 50, I went out and bought underwear in every colour of the rainbow, with bras to match. I started wearing low-cut, sexy tops to bed.” Five years later, she relates one recent surprise encounter with a male friend in the bread section at the supermarket. “It was hugs and kisses all around, and I tell you it wasn’t only the bread that was rising that day,” she laughs.
Coming down
But menopausal highs can be natural energy highs too. Another friend, now 68, remembers that she too had surplus energy and was on a natural high for four or five years. “I felt as if I could move mountains,” she says. Many of her friends were depressed, and she kept waiting for this awful menopause period to begin. “Every day, I would say to myself, ‘Well, maybe today is the day.’ But it never came. Really, my menopause was the happiest time of my life.” Maybe we were just lucky. Maybe we just had the right attitude. Or maybe it was something we were eating quite by accident in our diet, such as fish oil, ground flax, or soy. Whatever the reason, I am happy to have had this energetic, positive period in my life.
Finally, at age 56, I’ve come back to earth. I’m no longer dancing as much in the living room or lusting after my husband quite so often. My radio dial is typically tuned to earnest documentaries about the plight of the black-footed ferret. But I am grateful for this unexpectedly happy period in my life. Besides…my slinky mauve nightie is still hanging in my closet, on standby, just in case!
More on menopause:
The menopause gift guide
Menopause primer: Hot news about hot flashes
Hot flash-fighting food
Was your menopause experience a happy horny one? Do you have tips on how to deal with menopause, good or bad? Talk in the forums!
This article originally appeared in the September 2008 issue of More
