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In our Haute Flash newsletter I told the story of getting caught in the rain on the way to an interview and only realizing afterwards that I looked like a cubist nightmare. (Avoid this.)

But I have to admit I’m used to beauty disasters. My mom, who was a little bit too old to be a hippy but still leaned that way, raised me on Free to Be You and Me and with the concept that it’s what’s inside that counts. So – I ended up experimenting the hard way. Among some of my “fondest” (ha) recollections:

- Starting to shave my legs at camp — unfortunately for me, in the cold morning air lakeside, which resulted in shaving off the goosebumps and sporting scabs and stubble for the next week and a half.
- The same summer, my friend and I decided to style our hair. Neither one of us had hair gel, so we used Vaseline.
- For my wedding in 1994 I decided to get a perm so that I could sport loose waves. It was only the second one I’d had ever and did not realize that my hair would take the curl really, really well. Let’s just say we could have danced to “On the Good Ship Lollipop.” Shirley Temples for all!

The nice thing is that mom was right – it really is the confidence inside that counts. But I have to admit that the older I get, the more that confidence actually inspires me to learn about clothes and beauty products that work for me and not against me.

What’s your tale of beauty disaster? Share yours in the comments before Friday at noon (eastern time!) and you could win a 50 mL bottle of Shiseido’s Future Solution LX Total Regenerating Cream.

Edit: This giveaway is now closed; thanks for entering! Read the comments for some hillarious stories that will make you laugh out loud. The winner is #13: #

I went to high school one day having borrowed my mother’s very orangey estee lauder blush. None of my friends wore makeup, but true to 80’s form, I applied it as if it were war paint. One of the boys asked if I had something on my face, because it looked kind of funny. I didn’t need any help blushing after that! – Jacquelyn

As far as movie stars go, Julia Roberts is as big as it gets. So, it’s safe to say Lancôme have scored a pretty major coup: they’ve just signed the Oscar-winning actress up as their new brand ambassador.

Julia’s proud and excited about her new role. She told Women’s Wear Daily, “It’s kind of like every girl’s dream, really. To be 42 and have three kids and be a working mom, it’s a great moment to be asked to do this and to be able to do it.” 

Aside from her solid acting chops, I think one of the reasons Julia is so popular is because she has a truly accessible beauty (helped, no doubt by her mega-watt smile). She’s a master at making glamour seem effortless.

Her look for the Golden Globes is a great example of this – rosy cheeks, neutral, slightly glossy lip and a dark smudged shadow lining her eyes.

One of the easiest places to go overboard with colour is on the cheeks – a fast track to looking a little too harsh and possibly a lot crazy. Take inspiration from Julia’s light hint of colour on her cheeks (Lancôme’s Colour Design Cream Blush in Petticoat Pink). Her blush looks natural and flushed, rather than streaky or bold.

Congrats to last week’s giveaway winner on how to beat the blues: Lucky #8! “To beat the winter blues, I simply catch up on all the films I didn’t see the previous year. I rent a pile of DVDs, make some ‘virtuous’ air-popped popcorn, and curl up on the couch with a gigantic mug of green tea. Works like magic! – Heather R.”

Now, onto some health-related links that are making me feel like I won something:
Beer may help fight osteoporosis. (National Post) Who knew?
Your bra does not give you breast cancer (and let your daughter know). (New York Times)
Vitamin D is especially important if you’re darker-skinned. (CBC.ca)
Where do you stand on provincial funding for in-vitro fertilization?

For those of us who do not wear lipstick often (guilty as charged!), the dramatic impact of a crimson lip seems elusive and out of reach. But, as I discovered when charged by my editor to test-run red lipsticks, mastering the scarlet pucker isn’t as hard as it may seem. Whip it out on Valentine’s Day to add a little holiday-appropriate glamour to any outfit.

Day 1: Go bold or go home
Assembling the red lipsticks in my bathroom, I pick the brightest red of the bunch. Might as well start with a bang, right? Lesson number one: Exfoliating lips is a must with red lipstick. My first attempt at applying looks lumpy, so I take it off, gently exfoliate my lips with a face cloth, dab on some lip balm, and give it another go. Voila! A scarlet lip worthy of Gwen Stefani herself. If you’re finding it hard to stay in the lines, a lip brush is really helpful to keep your lipstick application smooth and on target.

Traveling to work on the subway, all I can see is the reflection of my red lips in the window. I have honestly never worn such bright lipstick in my entire life. Exiting the station, I see one of my friends from another magazine, who ignores me completely. A double-take later, she sees past the lipstick and realizes it’s me. Around the office, I get compliments on my lips. With the exception of some accidental smudging and leaving lipstick rings on my metal water bottle, the red lip is surprisingly easy so far; now if I could just find a less conspicuous colour…

Day 2: Retro red
For my second day I choose an extremely dark red that is nowhere near as bright as my first pick. Lesson number two: Red lipstick instantly emphasizes any redness in your face. Concealer is a must!

While the application process went smoothly, the colour didn’t look as good as the bright red from Day 1. By the time I got to work, I had put my finger on it. Lesson number three: Red lipstick is unforgiving when you pick the wrong shade. I ended up wiping it off after seeing my sallow reflection in the mirror. Back to the drawing board…

Day 3: Berry nice
On day three, I’m discouraged from my little shade mishap and decide to go a different colour route: raspberry. Of all the intense shades I’ve tried, I have to say I like this one the best; raspberry is as deep and dramatic as a red, but much more wearable. Experimenting with berry makes me excited for the pretty pink lips that stormed the Spring/Summer 2010 runways.

Day 4: Pencil it in
For my last day of red lipstick, I shake it up and try an automatic lip crayon. At last, red lip nirvana: versatile enough to be used as a lipstick on bare lips or over lip gloss to give a slight tint, this red looks like a darker version of my natural lip colour, and gets a thumbs up from my boyfriend.

After trying various shades, I’ve finally learned lesson number four: It takes time and effort to find the right red. But when you do, nothing beats the instant glam of a scarlet lip.

Next post: 39-year-old body. Here we go.

My relationship to my body has been complicated. As a victim of childhood sexual abuse, I spent a fair amount of time in childhood and early adolescence trying to achieve out-of-body experiences: Reading as a first and early pleasure, then television. I was, to put it mildly, an underachiever where sports and gym class were concerned. If you could skip them or hide at recess, I did.

I also was that kid who dressed in hand-me-downs and whose socks didn’t always match. But that’s a whole other post!

A lot improved after my parents sent me to Camp Ouareau. It might be a Canadian stereotype that a summer spent under the pines is an invariably wholesome and empowering experience, but in my case those summers – 7 of them – really were. The assumption was that we were there to canoe and swim and windsurf and play tennis, and so I did, and loved it. I also learned to trust my body – that practicing rescues does pay off when a swimmer needs rescuing; that when 9 counsellors-in-training are paddling against the waves and dusk is falling they will find extra stamina to get to the campsite.

I can’t say I fell in love with my body — I think one of the worst things about any form of abuse is that it can set a person at odds against herself in so many ways, and for me that was really expressed in a lot of bad habits around being tuned out and overeating and that kind of thing — but I had those experiences under my belt at least, along with the ripple chips and onion dip.

After I met my husband and married though, I started a slow weight gain that continued through my 20s. I’d like to blame his cooking but the fact was that aside from my one saving grace of loving to walk, I didn’t have any good fitness habits that didn’t revolve around showing up at camp. And since I wasn’t showing up…at 30 I found myself at a size 16 and pretty dreadfully out of shape. I hired a personal trainer named Cindy.

Cindy made me work. Free weights, lunges, step aerobics: You name it, we did it. She helped me believe in myself again as far as strength goes. I went down to a size 12 and started feeling much better about myself; I also formed a gym habit which did come and go a little bit (and I was never as close to as fit as many of the really cool women we profile at More). But it stuck well enough.

That’s the most fit and happy with my body I’ve been. Carl and I reformed our diet and bought a canoe and things were going great.

Then I had my daughter. I could not believe that an entire person came out of my body! Wow! But I also could not believe what that process did to my body. And before I really got a handle on that, I got pregnant again with my son and if I’d thought I’d seen stretch marks and sagging before, that was nothing compared to post-partum body #2. At least the one-year maternity leave gave me lots of time to walk and even brave the gym again.

Except…I never really got brave about it. I felt alien in my body again. I also felt guilty being away from my child (even though I know a healthy parent is important.) And I lost my workout mojo. Two and a half years ago. Ahem.

So I find myself turning 40 where I found myself turning 30: Out of shape! With bad health habits! A size 14 – and only in the forgiving vanity size loving stores.

And part of getting to midlife has also been to realize that it really, really does matter. One of my friends has had a cardiac event. I know, as all of you know, that the risk for many of the things that can really make aging lousy – diabetes, stroke, heart attack – can be lowered with healthy eating and physical activity. I want a healthy lifestyle, and know the only enemy is me.

So I’m getting back to the gym. I’m still suffering some laziness. (I’m going to try this workout. And lots of things I will be reporting on.)

I also have just now said “yes” to Weight Watchers here at work. I have some mixed feelings about that because I’m not a huge fan of diets, and also because I really want to stay focused on fitness and not on weight loss. But I also think that I need some motivation and to re-learn portion control and – hey, I said I would say yes this year. I said yes! I will keep you posted on my thoughts about that as I go through the process.

What’s your fitness and health journey been? Any tips or tricks? Any thoughts? I promise not all posts will be this long.

What’s your tip for beating the winter blues, blahs, boredom? My expensive tip is to schedule a holiday. But my cheap tip is to have a low-key, bring-a-dish party: Bonus points if it involves girlfriends and a movie marathon.

By now you know how the giveaways work: Leave a comment with your tip before noon on Friday, February 12 and we’ll randomly select one to win a 50 mL Eau de toilette spray of Lise Watier’s Folies Neiges.

Your comment will be approved, so if you don’t see it show up right away don’t worry; I hate doing that but we get a lot of spam comments so that’s why the lag. I love love love your collective wisdom, so share away!

Quick set of links for what we’ve been reading over the weekend and today:

From the Globe and Mail: Caring for aging parents inflames sibling rivalry. Who does Mom love best, anyway? And while’s you’re there, brave Anthony E. Wolf’s column about raising a teenager in love. (I am having enough trouble with a 4 year old missing an appendix, thanks.)

The publicity around Lori Gottlieb’s Marry Him sent me running to find her 2008 Atlantic article on the topic. I’m not sure I buy the premise (“any soul-baring 40-year-old single heterosexual woman what she most longs for in life, and she probably won’t tell you it’s a better career or a smaller waistline or a bigger apartment. Most likely, she’ll say that what she really wants is a husband (and, by extension, a child).”) but it’s still worth the read.

Veronica Tennant retire? Naw. (Toronto Star)

What’s caught your eye on the web today?

In the spirit of “just doing it” I will post about how my work-life balancing act was blown last week.

My son had emergency surgery for a perforated appendix, which was scary enough on its own. (He is home now and recovering really well.) But it also meant that my husband and I had to go back to Toronto’s Sick Kids Hospital, which was where my daughter died, and so I found myself with a lot of really tough feelings.

In the past, I probably would have stuck with work a bit longer and stayed up later into the night trying to balance things. But I have learned a little something about that as I get older. First of all, I really am not as able to think when I’m tired as I used to be.

Second, I am not as essential as I hope I am; other people really can do my job, at least in a pinch.

And third, I have learned that eventually most everyone will have a life crisis that impacts her work.

With these things in mind, I did focus on my son until Monday and then worked in a reduced schedule kind of way this week. I did cry at work, but only once. Everyone here was amazingly supportive.

What have you learned about crises at work? What should I keep in mind going forward?

A foundation brush is an essential tool in your beauty kit.

Yes, I’m giving “essential” the italic treatment. That’s because having a foundation brush is just as important as a good blush brush or eyebrow taming comb.

It may seem like a frivolous extra step, considering the ease at which you can apply product with your fingers, but trust me on this one, it’s a must-have.

There are two main reasons why I’m on the foundation brush bandwagon: they blend your product on beautifully and you’ll use less of it in the process.

Plus, call me beauty-kooky, but I find the brush sensation on my face quite soothing. And, okay, a brush makes me feel like a “pro”. This is obviously important to me and my ego.

Now onto the point of this story – which brush should you use? Foundation brushes come in two shapes: wide and flat, and round with thicker bristles towards the bottom and thinner ones on top (pictured).

Since I’m such a “pro artiste”, I have – and use – both. The flat one is best for building up your base for a soft but full coverage look, and the round one is great for giving a really light-weight, natural application.

My foundation brushes of choice come from Guerlain and MAC Cosmetics, but I’ve also tested out some great ones from Quo and Sephora.

Hi everyone,

It was a crazy week last week as my son had his appendix out emergency-style, so I apologize for not having announced the blog giveaway winner earlier. As a reminder I do it by a random draw out of all the comment numbers. This comment (#9) by cc is the winner, and I think it’s a great idea too:

“My best date would be one that I hope to have . I have teenaged children and have spent many years taking them to amusement parks now that they are old enough to go off on their own I would love to go on a fun date with him this year to an amusement park and go on all the fun rides!”

What’s your favourite amusement park?